Greetings America, from Joseph Stalin
I’m flattered beyond words to discover that the people of the United States of America have adopted my ruling methods. I particularly am impressed with your government’s success in spying on everyone. It exceeds my fondest dreams.
You have seen the wisdom of one-party rule. As Donald Rumsfeld observed “Democracy is untidy.” Your president, George Bush, noted “it would be so much easier if I were a dictator.”
Your gulag of secret prisons to house all the “disappeared” people was the one undertaking that left no doubt that I was the model for your current government.
I had a huge police force called the KGB, formerly the NKVD, to impose my will on the rebellious and independent minded people of the U.S.S.R. In America, you realized that my system was better and voted for it. No police threats were needed. You know it is your best defense against internal and external threats. All that bunk about democracy, freedom and justice that groups like the American Civil Liberties Union advocate will make the nation weak and vulnerable. The ACLU’s obsession with a literal interpretation of the Bill of Rights never stopped any external enemy from attacking you and it protected internal enemies. The ACLU runs to court each time your leaders ignore or circumvent the Constitution, invade some country, violate a treaty or show initiative in dealing with questionable laws and customs. They only divide, confuse and weaken the national resolve?
You also understand that morals are relative. Morals are standards the strong have for the weak, but not for themselves. As I responded when I was told the Vatican would disapprove of my actions: “How many divisions does the Pope have?”
Your mainstream media put my Pravda and Izvestia to shame. I conducted “show trials” to convict and execute those who were of questionable loyalty to me. They preferred to confess and be executed to spending another day in my prisons. Torture does work, as your leaders realize. Your media accuse themselves of being too liberal and overzealous as government watchdogs while they dutifully pass on the Party propaganda without comment or question.
The American people understand that there are times when they must be protected from the truth. You usually prefer to be immersed in fantasies just as a child craves fairy tales. Everyone wants to be spared the inconvenient realities of life. Consequently, you accept state secrecy and non-transparency realizing they do far more good than harm.
Your leaders switch positions as readily as I did. George Orwell captured the essence of my sudden policy reversals and the public reactions in his book “Animal Farm.” Your leaders obviously use “Animal Farm” as their governing manual. In the 1980s, when Osama bin Laden went to Afghanistan to help drive out the Soviet Union, your leaders funded him and called him a “freedom fighter.” When he led the same fight in the 1990s and 21st Century to drive the U.S. out of Saudi Arabia, his actions were called ”terrorism.” Saddam Hussein was a good friend and valuable asset to the U.S. from 1958 to 1990. Then George H. W. Bush tricked him into invading Kuwait and began calling him the “Butcher of Baghdad.”
Propaganda is far more sophisticated today than it was in my time, and your nation has refined it to near perfection. You eliminated the need to elect intelligent, capable people who might turn on the Party or come up with dangerous new ideas.
Your politicians do what the Party tells them, and you don’t even need to threaten them with executions. That anthrax attack in 2001, however, was a nice touch. The “opposition party” has been completely cowed, compliant and timid.
You are a very obedient people. Gas prices could rise to $10 per gallon and you would complain a little but pay it. You willingly pay for and die for your frequent wars even when they are based on the silliest reasons. Was Saddam Hussein going to load nuclear bombs into a squadron of balsa wood drones, send them half way around the world in 45 minutes and destroy the U.S.? You believed he was.
Unfortunately, even your sophisticated propaganda can’t control everyone. You realize that you still need torture, bullets, bombs, prisons and fear to keep order. You have more prison cells than any other nation in the world. At least I had Siberia.
The power of fear can never be overestimated. Scared people revert back to their animal natures and don’t think rationally or humanely. They are inclined to form into herds or gangs where they can be led wherever you want them to go. I knew that. Hitler knew that. Your current president knows that. Fear is the best indicator of what is an authoritarian or democratic government. If the government fears the people, it’s a democracy. If the people fear the government, as in my country and yours, it’s authoritarianism. To maximize fear, the government must manufacture an internal enemy as well as an external foe as Hermann Goering, Hitler’s top lieutenant, claimed. Internally, you have your Black minority and liberals to fear. Externally, you had Communism as a threat until 1991. When the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991, your leaders quickly invented terrorism to replace it.
People don’t want to be bothered with complicated questions such as: what is the best form of government or are there alternative economic systems? As I famously observed, “Kill a man, it’s murder. Kill a million, it’s a mere statistic.” It’s difficult to grasp mass murder and genocide and whether or not it is justified, right or wrong, a crime or self-defense. It’s easier to let your leaders tell you what is right and wrong.
Initially I felt that George Bush was modeling himself after Adolph when the Twin Towers fell paralleling the Reichstag fire, the neo-cons functioned like the Brown Shirts and wars of aggression were waged against tiny countries. The invasion of Iraq was analogous to Hitler’s invasion of Poland. Now there’s no doubt that I am George Bush’s role model. I can’t think of a single thing I would have done differently. I couldn’t be more proud of that little, dumb, fake Texan if he were my own son.
Older Americans might be uncomfortable with me as a ruling model. Many were harshly critical of me for doing what you are doing today. Thankfully, you Americans have very short memories and less ethics. Ours has been a love-hate relationship. During the 1930s you hated me. During WW II you loved me. After the war, you hated me again. Now, I believe you hold me in higher esteem than George Washington. The father of America’s 21st Century will be Joseph Stalin.
With admiration,
Comrade Joe
You have seen the wisdom of one-party rule. As Donald Rumsfeld observed “Democracy is untidy.” Your president, George Bush, noted “it would be so much easier if I were a dictator.”
Your gulag of secret prisons to house all the “disappeared” people was the one undertaking that left no doubt that I was the model for your current government.
I had a huge police force called the KGB, formerly the NKVD, to impose my will on the rebellious and independent minded people of the U.S.S.R. In America, you realized that my system was better and voted for it. No police threats were needed. You know it is your best defense against internal and external threats. All that bunk about democracy, freedom and justice that groups like the American Civil Liberties Union advocate will make the nation weak and vulnerable. The ACLU’s obsession with a literal interpretation of the Bill of Rights never stopped any external enemy from attacking you and it protected internal enemies. The ACLU runs to court each time your leaders ignore or circumvent the Constitution, invade some country, violate a treaty or show initiative in dealing with questionable laws and customs. They only divide, confuse and weaken the national resolve?
You also understand that morals are relative. Morals are standards the strong have for the weak, but not for themselves. As I responded when I was told the Vatican would disapprove of my actions: “How many divisions does the Pope have?”
Your mainstream media put my Pravda and Izvestia to shame. I conducted “show trials” to convict and execute those who were of questionable loyalty to me. They preferred to confess and be executed to spending another day in my prisons. Torture does work, as your leaders realize. Your media accuse themselves of being too liberal and overzealous as government watchdogs while they dutifully pass on the Party propaganda without comment or question.
The American people understand that there are times when they must be protected from the truth. You usually prefer to be immersed in fantasies just as a child craves fairy tales. Everyone wants to be spared the inconvenient realities of life. Consequently, you accept state secrecy and non-transparency realizing they do far more good than harm.
Your leaders switch positions as readily as I did. George Orwell captured the essence of my sudden policy reversals and the public reactions in his book “Animal Farm.” Your leaders obviously use “Animal Farm” as their governing manual. In the 1980s, when Osama bin Laden went to Afghanistan to help drive out the Soviet Union, your leaders funded him and called him a “freedom fighter.” When he led the same fight in the 1990s and 21st Century to drive the U.S. out of Saudi Arabia, his actions were called ”terrorism.” Saddam Hussein was a good friend and valuable asset to the U.S. from 1958 to 1990. Then George H. W. Bush tricked him into invading Kuwait and began calling him the “Butcher of Baghdad.”
Propaganda is far more sophisticated today than it was in my time, and your nation has refined it to near perfection. You eliminated the need to elect intelligent, capable people who might turn on the Party or come up with dangerous new ideas.
Your politicians do what the Party tells them, and you don’t even need to threaten them with executions. That anthrax attack in 2001, however, was a nice touch. The “opposition party” has been completely cowed, compliant and timid.
You are a very obedient people. Gas prices could rise to $10 per gallon and you would complain a little but pay it. You willingly pay for and die for your frequent wars even when they are based on the silliest reasons. Was Saddam Hussein going to load nuclear bombs into a squadron of balsa wood drones, send them half way around the world in 45 minutes and destroy the U.S.? You believed he was.
Unfortunately, even your sophisticated propaganda can’t control everyone. You realize that you still need torture, bullets, bombs, prisons and fear to keep order. You have more prison cells than any other nation in the world. At least I had Siberia.
The power of fear can never be overestimated. Scared people revert back to their animal natures and don’t think rationally or humanely. They are inclined to form into herds or gangs where they can be led wherever you want them to go. I knew that. Hitler knew that. Your current president knows that. Fear is the best indicator of what is an authoritarian or democratic government. If the government fears the people, it’s a democracy. If the people fear the government, as in my country and yours, it’s authoritarianism. To maximize fear, the government must manufacture an internal enemy as well as an external foe as Hermann Goering, Hitler’s top lieutenant, claimed. Internally, you have your Black minority and liberals to fear. Externally, you had Communism as a threat until 1991. When the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991, your leaders quickly invented terrorism to replace it.
People don’t want to be bothered with complicated questions such as: what is the best form of government or are there alternative economic systems? As I famously observed, “Kill a man, it’s murder. Kill a million, it’s a mere statistic.” It’s difficult to grasp mass murder and genocide and whether or not it is justified, right or wrong, a crime or self-defense. It’s easier to let your leaders tell you what is right and wrong.
Initially I felt that George Bush was modeling himself after Adolph when the Twin Towers fell paralleling the Reichstag fire, the neo-cons functioned like the Brown Shirts and wars of aggression were waged against tiny countries. The invasion of Iraq was analogous to Hitler’s invasion of Poland. Now there’s no doubt that I am George Bush’s role model. I can’t think of a single thing I would have done differently. I couldn’t be more proud of that little, dumb, fake Texan if he were my own son.
Older Americans might be uncomfortable with me as a ruling model. Many were harshly critical of me for doing what you are doing today. Thankfully, you Americans have very short memories and less ethics. Ours has been a love-hate relationship. During the 1930s you hated me. During WW II you loved me. After the war, you hated me again. Now, I believe you hold me in higher esteem than George Washington. The father of America’s 21st Century will be Joseph Stalin.
With admiration,
Comrade Joe
posted by Unknown at 6:53 PM
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