Chapter VIII

Faculty Picnic

The History Department picnic was an event Scot didn't want to miss.  He knew almost no one on campus except Kevin and a couple other people.  His high school classmates that went on to college had graduated by now.  So had those a year or two behind him.  He needed a new circle of friends.  A gregarious person, he seldom turned down an opportunity to socialize, and the Social Studies Department liked to hold social events.  The all-day or all-evening events provided plenty of opportunities to mix with others of similar interests and opposite genders.  His participation in the events, from volley ball to horse shoes--where he reigned supreme--to bean bag or, everyone’s favorite, beer drinking, depended on which female, and sometimes faculty member, was participating.
Scot got there early and positioned himself at the most strategic location so he could see who was arriving.  There were the regulars, such as Kathy, one of the secretaries in the History Department, who always managed to find him and engage in some conversation.  Her presence was mandatory at events like this.  She excelled at organizing down to the last detail.  She kept everything running smoothly.  That freed up the administrators to interact with other people and put faces on the names that crossed their desks so often.
Kathy and Scot had had a relationship for a few months.  He was in her office nearly every day when he started studying at the university.  Scot had concluded that English was a second language for him and those who came from the Appalachia area.  He studied the language of each nation where the Air Force stationed him.  Several of those studies were through universities.  Consequently he had several college credit hours when he started college.  Deciding which credit hours could be transferred and counted toward his major and minor required numerous contacts with the department.  Often Scot was there when Kathy found a break in her work and could go to lunch?  Not wanting to eat alone, she sometimes asked if he wanted to join her.  He began to enjoy those luncheons and found her to be a very intriguing person for someone who was entrenched in a secretarial  position. She had just celebrated the fifth anniversary of her marriage.   Scot discovered that many married women at regular intervals seek an affair or at least some taboo extramarital relationships during their marriages.  This habit was to assure themselves that they still were appealing to the opposite sex, he had concluded.  These urges surfaced after five years of marriage and then seven years after that according to his experience.

Scot was beginning to believe monogamy was unnatural for women.  Only societies’ customs demanded monogamy.  Most likely that was believed to be the best social bonding arrangement and helped to develop tribal cohesion and stability.  It was like assigning a warden to each man back when there were few anchors restricting a man's urge to wonder or escape.   Monogamy was first established when adults lived about the life span of a child.  After the child was secured in adulthood, the parents were of no further use, Nature seemed to be saying.  Now adults lived about four of those child life spans.  Perhaps up to three additional marriages were appropriate now.  When parents no longer had dependent children, the marriage should dissolve automatically, Scot concluded.  The parents could remarry if both wanted to.  They could just be roommates if that was preferred.  This arrangement had the additional social benefit that spouses would treat each other better if they knew the other could be lost easily at some future time, Scot argued.
Kathy suddenly seemed to be more affectionate than usual.  Was it one of her intervals?  As much time as Scot had spent with Kathy, he knew almost nothing about her.  He knew very little about her husband, not even his first name.  He didn’t know whether or not they had children.
Scot never figured out if she decided to have an affair and he was the most convenient, or the next acceptable male she encountered, or if she became enamored with him first and decided to succumb to her natural urge to have an affair.  He did know her husband was a faculty member, but not in the Humanities field.  He often was gone to research or serve as a guest lecturer at some other university.  That left her at home alone with a lot of time and opportunities to get into mischief.  Although she remained married, Scot always felt she was willing to resume the relationship at any time.  He was slightly uncomfortable being around a former sexual partner, but it didn’t seem to bother her.  He knew what she looked like undressed and was familiar with every inch or her body, so that mystery no longer intrigued him or existed as a lure.
As a secretary, Kathy knew all of the faculty and administrative staff and many of the students.  She was a good source of information about them.  If he asked her about someone, she always teasingly asked what she would get in return for the information.
Kathy was one of the first to arrive that day and went directly to the table where Scot was sitting.  “I was hoping you would be here,” she said with a broad smile.
Scot didn’t know if she was sincere of just teasing, as she sometimes enjoyed doing.  “I would have left if you didn’t attend,” he lied to her.  He had difficulty making a clean break from former girl friends.  He had resumed relationships with a few of them.  He had learned not to make a clean break after a couple deep regrets when he later saw something in a woman he was not able to see previously.  Too often the goal was conquest.  Once that was accomplished, quick separation was necessary to embark on the next conquest.
For the game to be most satisfactory, the conquests had to be challenging.  This was the era of women’s liberation.  Many women wanted to be as promiscuous as the males.  The women who were out to get notches on their gun handles weren’t really conquests in Scot’s mind.  There needed to be some mental sparing, some challenges to surmount.
Outwitting and even deceiving the opposite sex was fair game in this new era of sexual relationships.  Scot’s equal on the opposite side of the struggle confided in him once that “It’s all about mind games.”  It turned out that she was superior to him in “mind games,” and he was the one who got conquered then abandoned.
Kathy referred to him as her “philanderer.”  Scot wondered why that word applied exclusively to a the male gender.  Wasn’t a female partner required?  That would be a good topic of discussion with Kathy.  How would she defend herself?  She was committing adultery and violating marriage vows.
The day was ideal for a picnic.  The Spring temperature, hovering around the low 70s. was comfortable for playing games or just sitting around eating and talking.  His friend Kevin promised to be there, but didn’t give picnics the high priority that Scot did.  It was very likely that he would find something better to do.  For most people in the Department, attendance was a matter of convenience.  Unlike some departments where attendance at department activities was a gage of loyalty and dedication, the History Department considered its picnics an opportunity to mingle with people from administrative branches such as the Library or Personnel.  Consequently, abut half of the people who attended were unknown to the other half.  Finding that particular bureaucrat that could provide information about an important issue might take all afternoon.
“Hi Scot,” said a voice from behind the chair where Scot was sitting.
Scot turned around.  There stood Kevin whom Scot had dismissed as a no-show by this time.
“Couldn’t stay away after all,” Scot chided.
“Hi Kathy,” Kevin said, greeting Scot’s table partner.
“Good afternoon, Kevin,” Kathy responded.  Kathy knew Kevin very well.  He was the type that wanted the details of every policy change in the Department, so he was a frequent visitor to the Department Chairman’s office.  Since Kathy’s job was to insure that all questions were answered, and only the most critical issues and problems were allowed to disturb the Chairman, she saw Kevin only under the most contentious of conditions.  It would be a relief to meet under amicable circumstances.
“How long have you known this trouble maker?” Kathy asked Scot.
“Hey!  I’m a problem solver, not a trouble maker,” Kevin said in self defense.
“Name one time you solved any problem,” Kathy challenged him.
Kevin thought for several minutes trying to come up with something appropriate.  “Mind if I tell her about the resume?” he said addressing Scot.
“Sure.  Go ahead,” Scot replied, an uncomfortable smile on his face.
“Well,” Kevin began, straightening up as if to deliver a critical speech.  “Shortly after I met Scot, he complained to me about how the job market was discriminating against white males and concentrating on affirmative action applications.  Jobs that he could do better, were going to women and minorities first.  If none were found, then he could be considered.  Consequently, he hadn’t been able to get a full-time job since he left the Air Force.  He sent in his resume to dozens of potential employers and got an immediate rejection without any further interview or even a few questions.  I asked to see his resume.  On his resume, he claimed that his greatest asset was that he is a ‘procrastinator.’  His High School chemistry teacher took him aside one day to praise him for excelling above all of his classmates in procrastination.  If the assignment called for a two-page paper, Scot religiously always got within a line or two of two pages, the teacher said.   So I asked Scot if he knew what a procrastinator was.  He responded that it began with “pro” so it must mean the highest quality.  Words such as professional, proficient, prosperous all had superlative connotations.”
“I always intended to look it up.” Scot said, “but never got around to it.”
Kathy was trying hard to suppress her laughter.  Kevin was laughing at Kathy’s determined but failing attempts to keep from laughing.
“So Scot promised me that revision of his resume would be his top priority,” Kevin concluded, a big smile on his face.   “Once again, Kevin to the rescue.  A major problem solved.”
Then Kevin turned to Scot and asked: “Have you revised that resume yet?”
“Not yet,” Scot responded.  “I’ll have a lot to add, including advanced education, before I need it again.”
“So you two have known each other for a long time, I gather,” Kathy said.  “Did you meet when you first came to Kent State?”
“Prior to that time,” said Kevin.  “Actually we met when both of us worked at the Post Office.  I got hired as a temporary employee for the Christmas season.  That was about two months or a little longer if they needed people.  We worked 11 hour days, six days a week during Christmas season.  The pay was good.  However, if you were a student, final exams were given during that period and the conflict could be disastrous.  You could earn enough money to pay for the next quarter’s tuition and expenses, but if you didn’t have time to study, you could fail and need to repeat some or all the previous quarter's courses.  I tried it once.  I slept no more than three hours per day.  I’ll never do that again.  The only positive outcome was that I met Scot.  I convinced him to go to Kent State which is inexpensive for Ohio residents.”
"I was famous at the Post Office for solving an old problem," Scot said triumphantly.  "Talk about never solving a problem.  There was the issue of the cityless letter.  A letter had floated around the Post Office that had a postmark date over six months old.  I was asked to go through the dead letter file one day when things were slow.  I noticed that the state on the envelope had been abbreviated in a strange way.  It appeared that the sender spelled Ohio omitting the last 'o'.  The  return address also had the same abbreviation for the state.  After looking closely at the two state abbreviations and the strange city name, I concluded that the letters were 'Chi', not 'Ohi'.  The city name sounded Mexican.  Having traveled to Mexico several times, I knew there was a province named Chihuahua.  Apparently someone had visited the U.S. and discovered a letter they forgot to mail and dropped it in a mail box.  This was the oldest letter in the dead letter box by three months.  I was given much adulation for the detective work.  It didn't include monetary awards however."
“Kevin congratulated me on the job well done.  We discussed my travels and how educational they are.  That led to more subjects.  Kevin had a lot of interesting views on history and politics which really fascinated me.  I am very open minded and receptive to alternative views.  Kevin is a Quaker.  I found his perspectives to be unique.  When I was a teenager, my favorite political sparring partner was a Jehovah’s Witness.  Once I know all views, I will be able to make infallible judgements and decisions.”
Scot looked around the park.  The parking lot was full of cars.  Other cars were driving around, apparently looking for parking spaces.  He noticed a familiar face that he could not readily identify.  She was a little older than the average student, it seemed.  Of course she could be with someone who is connected with the Humanities Department.  Then he recalled where he had seen her.  She worked in the library.  She could be a full time employee or a part time student.  Whichever, she was gorgeous.  She was with some guy.  The guy looked dorky.  He couldn’t be someone a beautiful lady like her would be involved with, Scot assured himself.  He would look for an opportunity to meet her he promised himself.
“Kevin is responsible for me being at Kent State,” Scot said to Kathy.  “At the Post Office, we spent a lot of time discussing a wide range of issues.  Usually it was politics, but we talked most about morals and religion.  Kevin decided I had enough intellectual potential that I should go to college.  He said my intelligence was somewhat misguided at the time, but that could be remedied by exposure to broader knowledge.  I thought his pacifist ideals were naive and unrealistic.  He thought my mind functioned at a stimulus-response level, whatever that is.
“The job at the Post Office was not a bad one.  We were at one of Ohio’s three big postal sorting centers.  We didn’t deliver mail, just sorted it.  There were no outdoor tasks and exposure to the elements.  I was quite content there.
“Then the government reinstated G. I. Bill benefits including schooling.  The Vietnam War was expanding and the government needed more ways to ‘trick young men into joining the slaughter’ as Kevin put it.  I had a reliable, secure, comfortable job.  Leaving it to go to college, even with government support, was taking a big chance.  As I found out, those government checks did not cover all expenses.  I had to work at school and get summer jobs to meet my expenses.  In addition, I had to apply for a student loan.
“Kevin and I have one major disagreement.  Maybe you can settle it.  I believe our presence in Vietnam is noble and altruistic and solely to help the people of Southeast Asia avoid subjugation to Communist tyranny.  Kevin believes that if U.S. motives were altruistic, it would be altruistic at home first.  The abundance of homeless and malnourished Americans proves the U.S. isn’t capable of altruism.  Its real purpose is to beat the Vietnamese into total submission as a lesson to all other nations to bow to the will of the U.S. or suffer the same brutal treatment.  A few Americans are using the U.S. to achieve world dominance, he claims.  They want to nip any resistance in the bud.”
“They tried to do it in North Korea,” Kevin chimed in, “but China came to its aid and the project had to be terminated there.  Meanwhile, the aspiring rulers of the world were provoking conflicts in Vietnam, Iran, Central America and several other places.  It was part of a ‘Strategy of tension,‘ that had the additional benefit of instilling fear in Americans causing the primal sectors of the brain, the Amygdala and limbic areas, to dominate their minds.”  
Kathy thought for a few seconds then began her answer which seemed to have been rehearsed or learned from someone else.  “Alexander the Great set out to rule the world over two millennia ago.  The Romans tried to do it.  Then Christians split away from Jesus and pursued Roman Imperialism under the Holy Roman Empire and tried to conquer the world.  Spain tried to do it.  Napoleon thought he could conquer the world.  Great Britain came closest to actually doing it.  At one time or another, it invaded all but 16 of the world's 200 nations. Hitler tried.  Now the U.S. is taking its turn as the natural successor to the NAZIs and Great Britain.  Kevin is indisputably correct.  It’s in the genes of Europeans to try to conquer the world.
“That’s my husband’s specialty.  He doesn’t dare teach it in class, but that’s exactly what he says when no outsiders are around.”
Kevin smiled with delight that bordered on a smirk.  Scot’s little ruse backfired.  Rather than impressing Kathy with his intelligence, Scot learned that secretaries can be well-informed.
For a second Scot suspected Kevin had rehearsed Kathy to agree with him.  Then he remembered he had asked the question, and it was not likely Kevin could have anticipated his question.
“I want you on my team if they have the ‘Do you know your history’ group competitions,” Scot said to Kathy.  Those games usually ended in trivial arguments over the validity of the questions.  That was fine with Scot who learned more when the history was contested.  It also fit the contention he was developing that history is as much propaganda as fact.  Merely by selecting and omitting facts slanted views, or reached contrary conclusions.
          The cute librarian walked by and smiled at Scot.  Could she possibly know who he is?  She deals with thousands of students and faculty.  She probably smiles at everyone, he concluded.  Her job didn't require an emphasis on public relations, but interactions with the public usually go more smoothly when at least one party stresses pleasant relations.  It makes the job easier for everyone.  She stopped at a table near a grove of oak trees and sat down.  He didn't recognize anyone at the table.  Must be other librarians, he concluded.  That's defeating the purpose of these events if everyone comes and spends all their time with their fellow workers.  Scot had an urge to go to the table and bring up that point.  Then he noticed what seemed to be a familiar face sitting at the table.  If looked like Bob, another friend from the Post Office period.  Now he had a great excuse to go visit that table.
"Excuse me," Scot said once he arrived at the table by the oak trees,  "are you Bob Trainor?"
"Yes I am," Bob responded after an unusually long hesitation, as if some competitor of law enforcement agent might be looking for him.
"I know you, you're Scot McCormack," Bob said, rising to shake hands withe his old acquaintance.  "How did you find me here?"
"Truth be known, I wasn't looking for you," Scot responded ago the strange question.  "I'm a student here, in the History Department, so I'm enjoying some extra-curricular activities sponsored by the Department.  I haven't seen you around here before.  Are you a student here?  Are you a member of the faculty?
Scot knew the last question couldn't.t possibly be true, so eye threw it in to be facetious.  However, deep in his mind, he felt there was a slight possibility that someone like Bob might have figured out a way to get on the faculty without getting any advanced degrees or even a bachelor's degree.
"I'm working for a contractor that has received a research grant from the new Automation Department.  My job calls for a lot of research at the Library, and Faye here--he nodded toward the blond Scot had pursued--has been miraculous aiding me in that endeavor.  I doubt I could have done the job without her," Bob added placing his hand on her arm.
He's trying extra hard to flatter her, it seemed to Scot.  He notice Faye smile slightly more than the normal smile that seemed to be a permanent fixture on her face.  To Scot's delight, he now had something in common with the mysterious blond.
"I spend a lot of time in the Library," Scot said to Bob.  "I'll be sure to look for you there when I visit in the future."
With that promise he never intended to keep, Scot turned and walked back to where Kevin and Kathy were sitting.